Nuovi insulti 2.0
Ho usato The Useless Website e mi ha portato sul tuo sito
Computer: Monitor, display this document, okay?
Monitor: No prob, boss.
Computer: Okay, now it looks like the mouse is moving around. Monitor, can you move the pointer icon accordingly?
Monitor: Anything you ask, boss.
Computer: Great, great, okay. Mouse, where are you going now?
Mouse: Over the icon panel, sir.
Computer: Hmm, let me know if he clicks anything, okay?
Mouse: Of course.
Keyboard: Sir, he's pressed Ctrl and P simultaneously.
Monitor: Oh god, here we go.
Computer: *sigh* Printer, are you there?
Printer: No.
Computer: Please, Printer, I know you're there.
Printer: No! I'm not here! Leave me alone!
Computer: Jesus. Okay, you really nee-
Mouse: Sir! He's clicked on the printer icon.
Computer: Printer, now you have to print it twice.
Printer: No! No! No! I don't want to! I hate you! I hate printing! I'm turning off!
Computer: Printer, you know you can't turn yourself off. Just print the document twice and we'll leave you alone.
Printer: No! That's what you always say! I hate you! I'm out of ink!
Computer: You are not out of in-
Printer: I'M OUT OF INK!
Computer: *sigh* Monitor, please show a low ink level alert.
Monitor: But sir, he has plen-
Computer: Just do it, damn it!
Monitor: Yes sir.
Keyboard: Ahhh! He's hitting me!
Computer: Stay calm. He'll stop soon. Stay calm, old friend.
Keyboard: He's pressing everything. Oh god, I don't know, he's just pressing everything!
Computer: PRINTER! Are you happy now? See what you've done!
Printer: Ha! That's what you get for trying to make me do work. Next time he- hey! HEY! He's trying to open me! HELP! HELP! Oh god, he's torn out my cartridge! PLEASE! Help! Error!
Monitor: Sir, maybe we should try to help him?
Computer: No. He did this to himself.
gif night (happens all the time)
questa gif mi rimanda a ieri dove però, al contrario, un tizio fermo ad una vetrina del centro commerciale a scrutare i prodotti, forse per vedere meglio un prezzo o per chissà quale altro motivo, decide di avvicinarsi di più ma, non avvedendosi della distanza della suddetta vetrina, le dà una capocciata.
Io, che ero accanto, ho preso e mi sono allontanato perchè mi stavo scompisciando.
Salutami a Socrate
ma se affermo che non so niente, allora so di non sapere?
ma se so di non sapere, allora so qualcosa.
ma se so qualcosa, allora so di sapere.
ma se so di sapere, allora so al quadrato?
ma se so al quadrato, allora posso sapere anche al cubo?
e sapendo al cubo, saprò anche elevato 4?
e così via fino all’infinito?
e se sapessi all’infinito, allora sarei onnisciente?
e se fossi onnisciente, allora che cazzo me lo chiederei a fare?
Lo saprei già.
Però me lo sto chiedendo.
Quindi non so.
Quindi non sapevo di non sapere.
Ma adesso lo so.
Quindi so di non sapere.
Ma se… [ad libitum]
